2012年12月13日星期四

Funny Movie Cliché

So I was having dinner with two of my friends that I newly met after a long day in the lab, and while having dinner we talked about some dramas and movies. At some point we talked about some funny and stereotypical movie cliché and we laugh so hard because they are actually quite true. So here are some example. Have some good read.

1. In TVB dramas, important conversations always happen during family dinner, and it's usually a bad one which in the end one of the characters in the scene will stand up and walk away saying: '(Cantonese) I am not hungry, I have to go.', followed by a scene where the father and the mother staring at each other speechlessly and look surprised.

*Alternative ending of this scene, the angry dad slam the table with the chopsticks and scream: '(Cantonese) Spoiled kid (Sui Zai) !'

2. In TVB drama, millionaires ride cab and bus more than their own cars, and they don't have fancy sport cars in their garage, which is a contrast to western dramas where rich guy will always have a luxury car.

3. In TVB dramas and some Korean dramas, confession and proposal always happen after the guy upsets the girl or when something terrible (accident, mistake, or whatever) happen. Confession always happen under the rain, or at a pier, at the beach or outside of a restaurant after the girl ran away from a devastating dinner.

4. In every dramas and movies, the suspect will always have time to talk to the inspector or the victim when he is held by the guards or the police while he is being escorted. When the suspect finishes his speech, the policemen that hold him will say something like: 'Hey! Who you think you are? You think you can talk to anyone? Move!!!'

5. In Hindi or Tamil movie, the songs and lyrical contents are the screenplay. REAL screenplay are only taking maybe 5 - 6% of the movie. And all the dancers and the lead singer have the ability to teleport from place to place, from the park, to the beach, to the palace, to some random street, to a waterfall, to a train station or whatever place that they can possibly go. Oh, by the way, everyone know the choreography very well.

6. In TVB drama, fighting scene always started when the guy that's gonna be beaten walked into a dark alley and surrounded by gangsters in all the exits. It ends when someone (could be anyone, even the one that's not involve in the fight) screams: 'Cai Yan ah!!! (Police!!!)'. When this is screamed out, all the gangsters will run away, and the police will chase the bad guys, screaming: "Mmm Hou Zhau !!! (Don't run away !!!)". The one who got beaten always got ignored.

7. In TVB and Korean drama, the girl who wear high heels will sprain her ankle and the guy will carry her home, even the guy that carries her is the guy that she currently hates.

8. In Hindi or Tamil movie, the police inspector will always be suspended from his duty by chief inspector. While he is suspended he will investigate the case and solve the case...single-handedly. The classic action scenes while fighting crime include - amazing speed where he can run faster than car, or, amazing strength where he can catch a bullet by using finger, or, having a bulletproof body, or, swim faster than speedboat, or, walk from Goa to Mumbai while he is heavily wounded.


9. In TVB drama, if something happen in public (like a fight for example), the passerby will all gather around and point their fingers up and down and mumbling inaudible sentences.

10. In TVB drama, kids will always cry when his/her ice-cream got confiscated, and when they cry they are just rubbing their eye with their fists. Japanese and Korean drama though, kids cry for real. American drama, erm, they don't cry, they question their parents back when they got their ice-cream confiscated.

11. The very first time when the girl and the guy touches each other (accidentally or not), that's the time where they fall in love. The scene when they touched will be in slow-mo and the noises and voices are echoed and eventually lead to a silence where the guy look at the girl awkwardly for another 5 seconds. After that, time recover to normal speed and both of them look away and say 'sorry' awkwardly and the guy and girl will say they got to go. They will walk to the opposite direction and once they walk away the girl will blush so bad and give a little shy smile and the guy take a deep breath and exhale it forcefully once she turn around.

12. In Korean or Japanese drama, the parents are always so excited, cheerful and happy when their kids fall in love. TVB drama? Not so...

13. American loves explosion. That's why every explosion scenes in US film can last for 10 seconds long to 5 minutes. Classic explosion scene example - Rock music stop suddenly and the building or whatever timebomb shit explodes in slow motion, capture every extensions of the fire to the air. The main character (or the one who set the explosion) will keep his/her calm, wearing sunglasses and keep on walking as if nothing is happening.

 

14. In taiwan-hokkean dramas, monologues are more than dialogues, and slow motion apply whenever the main character meet his/her nemesis.

15. The golden rules of Hollywood films:
  • Everyone knows how to steal a car.
  • Everyone owns a gun.
  • Bodyguards are always in suits and holding their own hands in front.
  • Bullets will never run out.
  • The bad guy will not kill anyone before giving a 10 minute speech.
  • Every office have a whiskey.
  • The hero is a better shooter than the best US Marine marksman.
  • Screw physics.
  • Explosion scene has to last for at least 3 seconds.
  • Kissing is almost 80% successful if the lips of the guy and the girl is close enough.
  • Aliens and whatever disasters hate United States, especially New York City.
  • The wires of the timed-bomb is always red and green.
  • Every scientists are involve in biological weapon research.
  • Car explodes when it hits anything. ANYTHING.

16. In TVB drama, when the old man gets very angry, he will always faint and hospitalized. This usually happens when it reaches episode 17 if the series has 20 episodes.

17. In Japanese and Korean drama, the guy and girl fall madly in love, in the end one of them dies, usually it's cancer or terminal illness. Sometimes, car crash.

18. When the family members are visiting the prisoner in a prison, the visiting time always run out faster than any other prisoners who are already there earlier.

19. In TVB, Japanese, Korean and Taiwanese dramas, the doctor always says: 'We tried out best.'

*Alternative phrase: 'I'm sorry but you have cancer and nothing we can do about it.'

20. Everyone order either coffee or orange juice but drinks will never be served.

21. In Taiwanese drama, the girl is cute and very energetic. She always has a crush on the coolest and most handsome guy in the school/college. The guy that she loves does not know her and he is always in love with another pretty (but not bitchy) girl. The cute girl will have two friends (Most of the time - a silly guy who doesn't know any romance and his only love is basketball, and a girl friend who always give shitty advice to the cute girl). These two friends of her will eventually fall in love to each other. By the way, the coolest guy in college is the one who play basketball well.

22. Everyday is a rainy day after breakups.

23. Slapping is the ultimate and most disgrace punishment ever in TVB drama. *Audience approved.



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30 Days Photo Challenge - Day 2 - Take a Photo of Your Breakfast


Blue colour rice. Cool eh? This is call Nasi Kerabu and this is exceptionally delicious and tasty. It can only be found in Kelantan, as far as I know. With the crispy prawn cracker and fish cakes, combine with the freshly seasoned rice and vegetables mix, that's roughly how much I miss home.